shotgun shells and smoke filled air

Sometimes I think my blog must be boring. I have nothing interesting to write! Or else... maybe I do have things to write but I STILL am not comfortable with sharing on the internet? Yes, that's it. So many many things I could be writing about... that I want to write about. But they're clinging to my mind for dear life, unwilling to be written down for all to see. And so I write cryptic lists that only certain people understand. This would probably be easier if I didn't know all of you. That's something I can tell you about myself... When I get the guts to sing, or speak, or dance, or write, it's always easier in front of a large crowd. Small crowds are more intimate, it's easier for everyone to see my soul. But if it's a large crowd, I can hide somewhere later.

But I want to sing! I want to speak! I want to dance! I want to write! 

So tell me... what should I do?

p.s. i need to be more charitable.