Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Life Changes: Making a Choice

After we submitted all the applications, it was just a waiting game from there. Most schools wouldn't get back to us until March. So all we could do was sit tight and focus on our lives at the moment! Our lives at the moment were suddenly getting very exciting!

I found out I was pregnant right after we submitted all the applications. We were thrilled, of course! But suddenly a whole new stress filled my mind. Moving to a new place in August, with a baby due in September sounded less than ideal. I was consumed by thoughts of if we would be able to find a doctor who would take me on, where we would live, what I would do without my mom close by... it was too much. I started to hope that maybe we could just stay at Utah State for the masters, and then in a few years move somewhere else for the PhD. I knew this wasn't the right choice, but it sounded a whole lot easier.

As a professor, you have to have gone to more than one school in order to be marketable. If Alex stayed at Utah State for his whole education, he would have less chance of getting a job at a great school.

It got even harder when we told our families we were expecting a baby. Both of them told us that we better not go anywhere! There was also the thought of my sister coming home from her mission in September. I didn't want to move away without even seeing her! Utah State was sounding more and more appealing to me.

Alex and I had some tearful talks (tearful on my end) about if we would leave. I voiced my concerns and worries, and for once, he was the one telling me that I needed to believe everything would work out for the best. He had to convince me of my own mantra. Real life had come crashing down on me, and I let the worry take over, instead of the faith.

Acceptances and rejection letters appeared in Alex's email. (Why do they not send big envelopes anymore!? I mean, I know it's saving paper... but that would have been way more fun.) We were accepted to very exciting places, including The Imperial College of London! Alex had gotten ahold of the professor at Purdue, who was very excited to work with him, and offered him a Research Assistant position. He also had been accepted to the direct PhD program, which meant he could skip the Masters! This was exactly what we had wanted and more. We had decided that unless Alex got his school paid for, we wouldn't be leaving, because we didn't want to go into thousands of dollars of debt. With this research assistantship, Alex would have his tuition and fees paid for, insurance through the school, and would also be receiving a living stipend. It was more than perfect.

I tried to think of any reason to stay at Utah State, but the truth was plain to see. Purdue was the best option for us in every way. We accepted. Immediately the professor got us in touch with other graduate students and people from the ward, and they embraced us wholeheartedly. They emailed us with encouraging words, and offered to be of help in many ways! Helping us find a doctor, a place to live, or anything else we needed. It was obvious the right choice had been made. To make matters even more obviously good, my sister moved her homecoming date to a transfer early in August so that she could start school. I would be able to see her before we moved!

I'm going to miss my family so much, I'm sure it will be the most hard, painful thing I've ever done in my life. But you know what they say, with change comes growth. Alex and I are ready for this adventure, and we're ready to lean on each other when times get tough!

So with that, in August, we're moving to Indiana, and in September we're having a baby.

Now can you see what I haven't been writing?! What else is there to talk about?!! Now that it's all out in the open, I'm happy to be back :)

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13 comments:

  1. Congratulations on both things! Such exciting news about the baby though! I hope your transition is an easy one!!

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    1. Thank you! I really hope so too! :)

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  2. WOW! You have an exciting time ahead and I hope you can enjoy every single second. Congratulations on everything :) xo Amanda

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    1. Thanks! It is all very exciting!

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  3. Yay!!!! Thanks for the update. If I could give you any tips on homesickness... here is what I've learned:
    1) FACETIME or skype. A lot. I notice when I get homesick, it's because I haven't talked to anyone very much from back home.
    2) Try to visit often. I have the goal to visit once a year at least.
    3) Find good girlfriends where you are living. I know it won't be the same, but having girl nights helps me a lot.
    4) Accepting and taking advantage of your situation. I've found it hard to not have pity parties for myself wishing I was back home with my friends, back home where everyone understands me, and where I have a supportive community (which it sounds like you are going to have an AWESOME support system already!!!). It's hard to not think in the future wishing to go home, wishing to be back, or wishing to be back in your comfort zone. It's tough, but the sooner you realise and grow to love your situation rather than wishing for something different you'll be a lot happier!

    Anyways, I hope that helps a teeny bit. Haha I do need to listen to what I preach as well ;) this is just what helps me I guess. And hey! Look at the bright side! You're still in the same country and will give birth in a hospital where all the doctors and nurses speak the same language as you. You totally got this!!! I guess this is my pep talk for the day haha.

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    1. Mollie! I love your advice. I have totally admired you for living so far away from your family and having a baby (and now another on the way!!) I will definitely try to do the things you said. Thank goodness for modern technology! I'm probably going to skype/FaceTime home so much they'll get sick of me!

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  4. It will be the most scariest/best thing you will ever go through! I can't even tell you how close you and Alex will get. You think you can't get any closer JUUUSSST wait. And the mission field?! It's inspiring. I advise all couples to move away and get out of their comfort zone. (also so many people told me this when I was first moving away from the utah bubble and I didn't believe them...so it's okay if you don't ;)

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    1. Thanks Nicole! I do believe you! That's one part I am excited about actually. We've already been in contact with people from the ward out there and they seem so nice. I'm excited for Alex and I to really grow together, and I can't wait for missionary opportunities!

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  5. I can connect you with an AMAZING couple out there. One of my besties and his wife and adorable baby!

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    1. Oh please do! I am going to need friends!

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  6. That's so exciting! I'm glad you found such a great option. You'll figure it all out and be great!

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    1. Yes, it really all fell into place! Thank you!

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  7. We felt this way when we were job hunting. We didn't end up near anyone's family and it was hard the first few years, BUT it has been exactly what we needed! You are going to love Indiana!!

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