#4. the boy who proved me wrong

you may recall this scene in the movie Hitch. If not, go watch the movie. This picture is simply to illustrate a "doorstep scene". via

How did this happen? This boy that I had previously been SO annoyed with, suddenly here with me, making me laugh... Also making me go country dancing, which was something that I swore every year up here that I wouldn't do. Nothing is fun to me about swirling and twirling around the dance floor to "Honky Tonk Be Donk a Donk" or whatever in the heck that song is. But there I was tonight, enjoying myself. Doing awkward under the arm dance moves, and enjoying being with this kid.

We got out of his little red Eclipse, and made our way slowly across the deep snow of the parking lot. They never plowed our street. When we got to the little pathway up to my front door, he grabbed my hands suddenly and said, "lean backwards."

Well, I knew exactly what he was up to. He was going to drop me in the snow! At first I resisted, but finally I decided it didn't matter, and leaned back as far as I could. And... what do you know, he didn't drop me! So I stood back up and told him I wanted to do the same thing to him. So I grabbed his hands, and he leaned backwards. But, let's face it, I'm not exactly the strongest person in the world, and he fell into the snow, yanking me down with him. We laughed about this for a while, and I thought, is it going to happen? But soon enough, we both stood up and walked up to my front door.

We stood there hugging for a while. A long long while. And we kept saying good-bye. We kept saying goodnight, see you later, I had a lot of fun tonight... but we kept holding on anyway. I thought he wouldn't let go of me, but thinking back on it, maybe I just didn't want him to. (He would later say it was all my fault.)

Talking and talking and talking... it just kept going on, until finally...
I was teasing him, "Your Australian accent was totally fake!"
"No," he said, "I went on my mission there! It's normal to pick up the accent, I wasn't making it up!"
"You were faking," I said, "that's why I was always so annoyed with you!"
"Annoyed with me!" he cried, "it was real!"
I just laughed, because I never thought this would happen.
And then, without even thinking about it, we kissed. Oh yes, we kissed.
As the snow felt softly, with his car still running in the background, and the Asians driving back and forth on the road, we kissed.

p.s. it's been fun reminiscing with you guys... but i think the kissing posts will end here :)

hopelessly

It was one of those spring nights in Logan. You know, the one where the air is warmer than it has been, so you want to be outside, but still slightly chilly. And you're fighting the shivers as if to say to the atmosphere, "I am not going to feel how you want me to feel."

So we're sitting on the steps of my porch. My roommates are inside, laying on their mattresses in the living room, laughing at the television.

It's kind of surreal, me, looking at the stars, and you, looking anywhere but me. I knew this was coming. For the past two weeks I've been trying to prevent it. By doing all the wrong things, apparently.

"My roommates love you," you say. 

But not you, I think.

"You're so great. So fun to be around."

Not fun enough, I think.

"You've been so nice to me these past two weeks. Nicer than I've been to you."

Yes. This is how it always ends. Me being too nice. Since when was that such a bad thing?

"And it's just, we're going separate ways. I'm staying here, and you're leaving and going off to EFY and such. And I just don't see myself driving down to see you. I'm going to stay here."

And I want to tell you that I hate this. Not the fact that you and I are ending. Just the fact that you don't think I'm worth driving for. You aren't excited enough to see me that it matters to you. That I've been so nice lately, you haven't had a chance to miss me. And I want to tell you that I'm not ok with it, that I'm sick of being the person in the relationship who actually cares enough to make an effort. And when will I ever find a boy who thinks I'm worth it?

But I don't say that.

"Ok," I say, "If that's what you want."

But the atmosphere collects my real thoughts. I'm not going to feel how you want me to feel.

p.s. harry potter in imax today? don't mind if i do.

Gooday Mate, have you seen a Kangaroo?

Dear boy in my history class,

The first day we met, you thought I was someone you knew from high school. You were wrong. However, that isn't the important thing. The important thing is that you talked in an American accent. Now, whenever we have a conversation, your Australian accent gets more and more pronounced. I understand that you went there on your mission. I understand that Australia is cool. I also understand that most girls find the Australian accent to be the most attractive. The thing is, we like authentic accents. Not fake ones that you picked up after two years. It's ok, you can talk like the rest of us now. And also, please stop lecturing me about doing my homework.

Thank you very much!

Madeline

p.s. Where do all of the foreign exchange students go for the holiday's? Fall break, spring break... that kind of thing.