the reality of christmas

art by walter rane

The reality of Christmas is that - setting all presents and music and memories and parties aside - we are celebrating the most significant day in the history of the world.

"For unto you is born this day, in the city of David, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord."

After all is said and done, it's a beautiful and peaceful thing to sit back and remember why do this every year. The quiet moment when you are looking into the lights on the Christmas tree and thinking, i cannot believe this is all real.

It's unbelievable, isn't it? The fact that Christ is a real person, who was born here to save us. Each one of us. So unbelievable. Thank goodness we have Santa Clause to strengthen our belief system... :)

But honestly and truly, I was walking around Temple Square in Salt Lake City on Tuesday night, and as I watched a small portion of the Nativity scene, I couldn't help but have a moment of thinking - This REALLY happened. These things are true. Christ the Lord was born that day. Choirs of angels sang for Him. Shepherds came to Him. He was born in a manger.

The awesomeness of this story never ceases to amaze me. And the love of our Savior is even more amazing.

The fact that he came here. Even for me, just a girl, to take care of me. To show His love for me. 

For each one of us individually.

It's amazing, inspiring, wonderful, beautiful, and yes, unbelievable.

But this is something I don't just believe.

I know it.

I know it with all my still beating heart. And that knowledge is something that carries me through each day. The fact that someone up there loves me and would die for me. That no matter what happens, I am never alone.

And that is the true reason I celebrate Christmas.

if you just believe

my favorite version of santa

Today, I need to talk to you about Santa Clause.

Last night at a ward party, I announced to everyone that I still believe in Santa.

They all rolled their eyes and chuckled - such a Newhouse thing to say.

But honestly, it's basically true.

You may be giving me the same look those people at the party did, but please, let me explain.

I don't remember how old I was when I first believed in Santa Clause. I feel as though I always knew about him. I do remember how old I was when I heard the "truth" about Santa Clause.

I was standing in the kitchen, facing my mother. I had already heard it from someone else, but I had to know, had to ask someone I trusted if it was right. I knew it was, deep down in my soul, but my heart longed for the belief to linger. To stay just a little longer.

There's something about believing in things that makes us stronger. Whether it's Santa, or a crazy theory, or the fact that we can pass a class, or the pure belief in ourselves... just the act of believing in something is an extraordinary talent.

I have heard friends and acquaintances say that they will never tell their children about Santa. They feel that it is "wrong to lie" to the children. This saddens me. 

I did not feel lied to, as I stood there listening to my mother pour out the truth. I felt a certain loss of something intangible, a bit of magic childhood slipping out of me. But I felt something else, the capacity to believe in something get steadier, more reliable.

And that is why I think Santa Clause exists. That is why I still believe in him.

I came across someone's blog a little while ago, and stumbled upon a post where she was explaining how she told her daughter the "truth" about Santa Clause. In a very touching letter, she explains all of my thoughts on the matter, so I will leave you with this:

Dear Lucy,

Thank you for your letter. You asked a very good question: “Are you Santa?”

I know you’ve wanted the answer to this question for a long time, and I’ve had to give it careful thought to know just what to say.

The answer is no. I am not Santa. There is no one Santa.

I am the person who fills your stockings with presents, though. I also choose and wrap the presents under the tree, the same way my mom did for me, and the same way her mom did for her. (And yes, Daddy helps, too.)

I imagine you will someday do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them run down the stairs on Christmas morning. You will love seeing them sit under the tree, their small faces lit with Christmas lights.

This won’t make you Santa, though.

Santa is bigger than any person, and his work has gone on longer than any of us have lived. What he does is simple, but it is powerful. He teaches children how to have belief in something they can’t see or touch.

It’s a big job, and it’s an important one. Throughout your life, you will need this capacity to believe: in yourself, in your friends, in your talents and in your family. You’ll also need to believe in things you can’t measure or even hold in your hand. Here, I am talking about love, that great power that will light your life from the inside out, even during its darkest, coldest moments.

Santa is a teacher, and I have been his student, and now you know the secret of how he gets down all those chimneys on Christmas Eve: he has help from all the people whose hearts he’s filled with joy.

With full hearts, people like Daddy and me take our turns helping Santa do a job that would otherwise be impossible.

So, no. I am not Santa. Santa is love and magic and hope and happiness. I’m on his team, and now you are, too.

I love you and I always will.

Mama

letter found via

There you have it. Always, always, always, remember the true meaning of Christmas. But also remember to believe.

the best way to spread christmas cheer...

sisters eating panda express for lunch. because we can.

Well, the above pictures are just a sample of what I enjoyed yesterday.

So many wonderful things about being home... and one of them is grabbing lunch with my lil sisters during their break. We love being together, obviously. And the best part is, I blend right in with all the high schoolers getting their panda express on.

saaaaweet.

Anyway. I promised this week would be all about Christmas, and it is. So here is what I wanted to share with you today.

Christmas music. Love it. Sing it. Listen to it. Cherish it.

(if you're a hater, you better run to another blog... and fast.)

I sneakily listen to Christmas music as soon as it's on the radio. It doesn't bother me if it's too early. I understand that it does bother some people, and that is totally fine. To each his/her own. 

However, Christmas music makes me overwhelmingly happy. And who doesn't like to be happy? Helllooooo.... it makes total sense to me.

So, in honor of this season full of love, I'm going to share with you some of my can't-live-without-it Christmas music. 

1. The Christmas Song - Nat King Cole (this version is hands down the best. even though i'm a huge gigantor fan of michael buble's version, nat king cole gets me every time.)

2. O, Holy Night - Josh Groban (this man was made to sing this song. the power and spirit this song brings into the season is just what Christmas needs, because it's exactly what Christmas is about.)

3. All I Want For Christmas Is You - Michael Buble (this is a recent addition to the list. and honestly, his whole christmas cd is a can't-live-without-it christmas song, but i didn't want to bore you all with the same ole person singing the same ole songs. but seriously. check it out.)

4. White Christmas - Bing Crosby (as much as i like the i-yi-yi-yi'm dreaming version... this one takes the cake.)

5. Believe - Josh Groban (from polar express. yes, i know that this is another josh groban song. but this song describes my christmas spirit to a t, and i canNOT live without it.)

i'll leave it at that, but believe me, this list goes ON and ON.

What are some of your favorites?

p.s. you know what's fun? going through your wardrobe and putting together new outfits you have never. even. thought about. it's like a whole new wardrobe up in here!

tradition! tradition!

just a small sample.

I was raised to love Christmas from my dad. Sure, my mom definitely had a hand in it as well, but as long as I can remember, Christmas has been my dad's thing. He is renowned in this area for being a master of Christmas decorating. His lights rival that of anybody's around the neighborhood. But it's the inside of the house that's where the magic happens. Over 250 Santa's reside inside our house at Christmas. They're on shelves, tables, trees, stockings... you name it, there's a Santa. This collection has been growing larger every year since I was a little child. But I'm not going to talk to you about Santa today, no, that deserves a far more important post later this week. What I have to say about Christmas this day, is about tradition.

What a wonderful time of year! It seems that the main goal of this month is to find happiness. To be filled with joy. And the best ways we know how to do this remain the same, which I think is why traditions are formed. If it isn't broken, why fix it, right?

Some of my favorite Christmas traditions involve the suspense of the whole day. My family is notorious for dragging it out. Never in my life have I woken up early in the morning, run to the tree, and thrown myself to the task of opening presents. No. That is not how we do things. We all wake up around seven or eight-ish in the morning. At that time, my dad starts our big Christmas breakfast, and us kids have to make sure that our rooms are nice and clean. No way are we getting anywhere near breakfast or the desired Christmas tree if our rooms are not clean. When that is completed, my brother and sisters and I often find ourselves waiting on the stairs, begging our parents, "please please please can we come up? Can we eat breakfast? when can we see the tree!?"

My parents finally allow us to come up the stairs, blocking our view of the tree until we sit down. Yes, we are not even allowed to see the tree or presents until we have eaten. When I was little this was almost too much for me. The excitement of the day still almost takes my appetite away, and I remember impatiently waiting at the table for Mom and Dad to take their last bite, just so we could please move on with the day.

Oh, but don't worry, we still have to do the dishes before we can get to presents. No messes allowed on Christmas!

After all this is done, we line up, youngest to oldest, and when Dad says go, we get to run into the living room to see what Santa has brought.

And it is always, always, just as magical as I hoped the night before, struggling to fall asleep.

What are some of your Christmas traditions?

p.s. Ozzy totally should have won survivor.

tonight, we are young

It feels absolutely wonderful to be home again, with family, sleeping in my HUGE queen-sized bed. Oh, how I've missed this place. As soon as I walked in the door, I was greeted with a winter wonderland.

A tribute to my childhood, to simple days of love and magic. 

To days of cuddling with my dolls and gazing out the window, trying desperately to see a sleigh pulled by reindeer flying through the sky, but always falling asleep before it appeared.

Days of dancing in front of the screen in the theater after Aladdin, making my dad stay with me until the music finally stopped.

And maybe that's why, after watching a movie with my lil sis tonight, I convinced her to stay for the credits, when everyone else had left, and dance with me in front of the screen.

I refuse to be too old for things.

I refuse to forget how to feel excited.

I refuse to give up the little stuff.

Tonight, and for the rest of my life, I am young.

I will believe in Santa.

I will stay awake staring out that window.

And I will dance.

p.s. i'm posting this on sunday because i wanted to say it. and also because this next week is devoted to my thoughts, feelings, and memories about christmas. be prepared. i am one of the crazy christmas people.

the world better prepare

weekend preview. a lot of exciting things going on... that is for sure.

man, oh man. do I have a lot to say to you people!

my whole thought process is in blog posts these past few days.

i must remind myself that i have plenty of time to blog about it all.

self, you have plenty of time to blog about it all.

for now i will say,

i love being home. love it. love it. LOVE IT. 

can you believe this is only the second time i've really been home this whole semester?

that is unheard of for me.

one year, i went home EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND. except for two or three at the end of the year.

but that's a whole other story...

all i can tell you is that here, around our house, it's beginning to look a lot like christmas (now picture michael buble singing that song. you know you love it.)

don't judge us.

we go to Island Park, Idaho for Thanksgiving, so when we come home we like to be all decorated and ready to go.

anyway, i'm in love i'm in love and i don't care who knows it.

life is good.

p.s. yeah, i just saw breaking dawn part 1. let me just say, i have always been team edward for bella, and team jacob for me. i mean seriously? who would pick a rock hard frozen man over a really warm soft one? i'm just saying. bella is an idiot. i rest my case.

you'll shoot your eye out

It's Christmas Eve and I'm blogging. But you have to understand, Santa is COMING. We have to be in bed or he won't show up! I think technically I need to be asleep... but that will come in a moment. I've just had a wonderful day singing Christmas songs at the top of my lungs, wrapping and opening Christmas Eve presents, playing with my family... 

Some highlights from today:

Watching the new Chronicles of Narnia with my family

Going to Olive Garden while my little sister coaches me on how to win the heart of the cute waiter

Opening secret people gifts... thanks for the keychain, Olivia!

Opening pajamas. We all got Utah State pajamas. My mom accidentally bought all of us girls (including herself) USU MOM T-shirts. She had no idea. We wear them with pride.

Getting a little teary eyed watching Ralphie find his Red Rider BB gun behind the desk

... and coming here to blog about it.

Good night everyone!! SANTA'S COMING!

p.s. yay!!

To Kids From 1 to 92

Here's the deal. I love Christmas. I blame it on my dad. He's a gung-ho Christmas man with a plan, and he's the reason my house looks like a Christmas wonderland. I feel the same way as he does. I love Christmas with all my heart. It isn't about the day, and the presents and all of that. It's about the whole spirit! I often say that I still believe in Santa Clause, and I know that doesn't make any sense, but it's because I really truly wish with all my heart that he was there at the North Pole. That sounds so cheesy and silly, but I can't help but wish there was a little bit of magic in the world. And that is what I love about Christmas, that even though there might not be any elves working away, no naughty-or-nice lists, and no fat old man eating the cookies on that plate in the living room, I can still feel the magic. The spirit of the season. We don't have to have Santa up there preparing for take-off with his reindeer, we make our own holiday magic. We remember what this holiday is all about, and we give each other things, help each other out, sing songs, write cards... it's all about the spirit and the magic. I have always, and will always believe in Santa Clause.

Now here's something my dad reads to us every year. Enjoy!

Dear Editor-

I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. 
Papa says, "If you see it in The Sun, it's so." Please tell me the truth,
is there a Santa Claus?
   Virginia O'Hanlon

Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the 
skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They
think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little 
minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's are little.
In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his
intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured
by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and 
generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give 
life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! How dreary would be the world if 
there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no
Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance
to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except
in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world
would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You
might get your papa to have men to watch in all the chimneys on 
Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa 
Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, 
but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in 
the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you 
ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no 
proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the 
wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world. 

You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what make the noise inside, but 
there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest men, 
nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived 
could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that 
curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is 
it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this  world there is nothing else real and 
abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! He lives and lives forever. A thousand years 
from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue 
to make glad the heart of childhood.

p.s. now you should listen to this song. 

Wanna Hear a Story?

Yesterday I was at work. I'm not going to tell you where I work, but if you like really awesome and freaky fast sandwiches, contact me. My boss asked me if I could make my way back to the freezer and grab some more cheese to be sliced. I bopped on over to the freezer, opened the door, and stepped in. The cheese was on the top shelf in a box, so I had to kind of reach, but finally I pulled it out of the box. Just as I retrieved the cheese, I heard a SLAM! The freezer door had shut on me. My stomach dropped and I had a moment of panic. In one second I remembered all of the movies and TV shows I had seen where people got stuck in freezers. (There aren't that many, but I mean, it's always been a concern of mine.) I turned around ready to bang on the door with all of my might for someone to free me, when what appeared right in front of my face? A sign that read, "Don't worry, you are not locked in."

Last night, I attended a Christmas party. We were required to bring white elephant gifts that were funny but also useful, so it wasn't just a bunch of junk. I bought a Toy Story 3 card game that came with 2 pairs of 3D glasses! (Congratulations, Taylor). It was quite a riot, exchanging the gifts. We all got a bit confused whenever we heard the word "skip" but in the end, we all had a present. I received a Robert Pattinson Calendar. (Thank you, Kenzie). If you don't know who he is, more power to you. Google him. Anyway, the calendar ended up in my car, and I spent the rest of the night jumping on couches and beds and playing truth or dare. In the morning I had to scrape the ice off of my car. I live in a very cold place, and ice is pretty normal. As I was scraping off the passenger window, I saw a face looking back at me. It was good ole' Robert - pale skin, red lips, messy hair and all. I jumped.

Today, I had to wear a headband because basically I was having a bad hair day. One of those big headbands with a flower. When I was at my other job - working at the desk - an old man came in.This is pretty normal, don't worry, old men come in all the time. The first thing he said to me was, "You look like you're wearing a Christmas Bonnet!" I politely laughed, and waited for him to tell me what he needed. I know what you're thinking I'm going to say - That I'll never wear this headband again? Wrong. Who doesn't like a festive Christmas Bonnet?

p.s. I was so excited to drive home today, that when I had my car all packed up and pulled out of my parking spot, I screamed "CHRISTMAS!!!!!!"