tonight, we are young

It feels absolutely wonderful to be home again, with family, sleeping in my HUGE queen-sized bed. Oh, how I've missed this place. As soon as I walked in the door, I was greeted with a winter wonderland.

A tribute to my childhood, to simple days of love and magic. 

To days of cuddling with my dolls and gazing out the window, trying desperately to see a sleigh pulled by reindeer flying through the sky, but always falling asleep before it appeared.

Days of dancing in front of the screen in the theater after Aladdin, making my dad stay with me until the music finally stopped.

And maybe that's why, after watching a movie with my lil sis tonight, I convinced her to stay for the credits, when everyone else had left, and dance with me in front of the screen.

I refuse to be too old for things.

I refuse to forget how to feel excited.

I refuse to give up the little stuff.

Tonight, and for the rest of my life, I am young.

I will believe in Santa.

I will stay awake staring out that window.

And I will dance.

p.s. i'm posting this on sunday because i wanted to say it. and also because this next week is devoted to my thoughts, feelings, and memories about christmas. be prepared. i am one of the crazy christmas people.

the words that don't come out

dancing in the rain

I'm sorry. Do I keep talking about this? the whole dancing in the rain during a lightning storm thing? It's just that, it was one of those great moments in life. 

There we were, sitting next to each other on the roof of the car. Watching the sky light up, over and over again. Listening to a playlist made only five minutes ago, for this occasion especially. 

And a feeling came over me, that if this was truly happening right now, I should do something about it. But what? 

So I said, "It would be awesome if it started pouring rain right now." 

Lauren looked at me quickly, wide eyed, and gasped, "Did you feel that?"

And the next thing I knew, we were jumping off the car, and dancing. Spinning around and around as the rain drops hit everything in sight, making the warm pavement smell like summer. 

Just one of those moments when you realize, 

life is absolutely, breathtakingly perfect.

Even during the times where it may seem that things are going wrong, or are falling apart, or you'll never be happy again... life is still perfect. 

It's exactly the way that it is meant to be. 

Beautiful, and terrifying.

It's a lightning storm.

p.s. what do you want to become?

like you always do

My Thoughts Right Now

EFY is really pretty cool.

I kind of love being an EFY counselor.

Sometimes I find it weird that I'm a real person.

I hope nobody comes into work today so I can continue doing nothing.

Please please please little EFY children... stay on the right path.

I'm loving the counselors that I work with.

Late night phone calls.

Dancing with people you have a crush on.

How fun next week is going to be with my sisters. All of us together at EFY... get ready for awesome.

Hair colors.

Farmer's tans.and the fact that i have one now.

Toms. and the fact that i also have a tan line from them.

EFY EFY EFY.

The fact that I had an awesome blog post for you all to be pondering this week but Blogger deleted it and I'll post it tomorrow.

K bye.

p.s. sometimes I am so ridiculously... OBVIOUS.

if I throw my hands up any more they're going to fly off

First of all... I'M BACK.
And now, I just have to spout some words of wisdom for all of you less-wise people out there. Listen, learn, take it to heart. Here's something my mother told me all growing up:

PLAY THE MOVIE ALL THE WAY THROUGH

Some of you may be scratching your heads, staring at the words and wondering what they mean. Well, I could break it down for you word for word, but I'm going to allow you the benefit of the doubt. It means looking ahead to see all the consequences of your actions. And let me tell you, this is probably the best advice I can give anyone. And let me also tell you that I am extremely good at playing the movie all the way through. In fact, I'm a little too good at it. Ask me about any scenario and I can tell you all the ways it could play out based on the decision you make. Now, some of you may be laughing quietly to yourselves and saying, "well, why didn't you play the movie all the way through when you got the assignment to do those ten essays on the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL??" And to you I would say, I did play the movie all the way through. I saw the consequence. I saw the future. I saw myself during dead week, cramming two or three essays in each day before the due date. And let me tell you, I shook my head at myself for being so terrible and procrastinating so badly. But I knew it would happen, and I accepted the consequence. Now, for other things, I'm not so willing to accept the consequence, so I change my actions. And that is the moral of the story. Is this a story? I'm not sure.

Ok, what I really want to say is that my mom is always right. Always. And today I did something that she's been trying to tell me to do for years and years. And it felt so good. I practically skipped to the library today to write my final essays. I had a smile on my face. I felt amazing. And it's because of these two words and an emoticon I received in a text message after I finally said what I should have said ages ago... "good answer :)"

Here's to saying what you need to say and playing the movie all the way through. My mom's a genius.

p.s. Why do I think dancing like a super dork is cool? Oh, because I just don't care.